Thankfully, I've never had the need to retain the services of Orkin. But, thanks to their fantastic commercials featuring human-size pests, I will absolutely do business with them if the need ever arises.
In this spot, a woman anxiously awaits meeting her blind date at a restaurant, glancing at a picture of a handsome gentleman on her phone while glancing around to try to recognize him. As she looks away, an unseen voice, slightly breathy, raspy and altogether creepy, addresses her by name. The woman looks up and is startled to realize that her blind date is a gargantuan termite. He introduces himself as Todd, which, in my opinion, is one of the best possible names the commercial creators could have chosen for a big ass termite. It just sounds ridiculous, and clearly these ads are meant to be ridiculous.
The woman, terrified, tells Todd that he doesn't look anything like his online picture. Todd tells her that the picture was taken years ago, and while we know Todd is a stalker insect, how cool would it be if he was telling the truth? Imagine if years before, Todd looked like a soap opera actor, and then gradually developed termite features as time went by. Or, would it be cooler if he just woke up one morning and was a giant termite? Can you see him going into the bathroom to brush his teeth and looking at the mirror - "What the fuck?"
My other favorite thing about Todd is that he's about as subtle as Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino from Jersey Shore. He immediately asks Jennifer to go back to her place, despite how obviously revolted she is by him. He even caresses her hand suggestively, which may be grounds for legal action her part. What strikes me as hilarious is thinking about Todd's imaginary past, before the events portrayed in this commercial. Has this routine worked before? I bet Todd is crawling with STDs and is the father of several illegitimate half-human, half-termite kids.
Just as a possible sexual assault is about to occur, the Orkin man shows up. He dressed in a cool outfit, complete with a hard hat and an Orkin belt buckle. Presumably, Jennifer and the Orkin man flee the restaurant and leave Todd behind. Once there, Todd cruises by in a Pontiac Trans Am with pink lights underneath. He stares at them menacingly, and the Orkin man marks his territory by sticking an Orkin stake in the yard. In each Orkin commercial in this series, once the Orkin man clears the house of pests, the pests drive by in some type of vehicle on their way to what we assume is another residence. It's an extremely cool ending to the ads. I recommend you watch the Hot Tub one and the Vacation one especially.
One last thing; how obvious is it that Jennifer is gonna bang the Orkin man after the commercial ends? Even the music hints at some boots-knocking going down. I think there needs to be an entire movie or television series based off of these Orkin commercials, because I simply have to know more about what goes on in these situations. I would DVR the shit out of a show like that.
Final Grade: A
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