I don't have kids, and I don't know a whole hell of a lot about raising them. I think I would probably be grossed out about changing diapers, though, since I refuse to use port-o-johns or most public restrooms on account of an irrational fear of other people's fecal matter. Perhaps that will change if the fecal matter belongs to someone I'm responsible for bringing into this world, but I'm not counting on that being the case.
Luvs has been running a commercial that has to be seen to be believed. It combines the party-rap stylings of Tag Team and a stadium full of babies cheering for a contest in which other babies try to out-shit each other. Here's the video, and the review is coming after the jump.
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| As perfect a poop soundtrack as there ever was. |
Damn, there is a lot of stuff to get to here.
First, we hear the familiar "yeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaahhhhhhh" of Tag Team's "Whoomp! (There It Is)," which is always welcome to my ears. But in this case, the "there it is" is referring to a baby's shit. You could pause the commercial three seconds in and realize that something weird is afoot, and that's before they show babies with cell phones snapping pictures of babies trying to launch massive turd-bombs into their Luvs diapers.
More on that in a minute.
The name of this contest is the "Heavy Dooty Championship," and I guess the idea is to take the biggest dump without any of it spilling out of the diaper. If this was real, I would probably watch it. As grossed out as I am by the idea of touching someone else's shit, I'm absolutely fascinated by watching creative, recreational methods of defecating. It would be great to see the diapers that couldn't hold up to the excremental barrage, and to hear some awful commentator like Joe Buck remark about the physical limitations of a diaper.
When I saw the first baby's diaper blow up, I couldn't understand how this commercial ever made it to air. I mean, it's not the crudest commercial ever made, but it's gotta be damned close. Especially considering it involves babies. Normally, commercials involving babies either attempt to be really sweet and heartfelt or funny and cute. This was more funny, but in a slightly fucked-up, shocking way.
I really like the inclusion of the babies in the crowd snapping cell phone pictures of the competition. This asks us to believe that not only is this a contest in which babies attempt to shit the most with exploding a diaper, other babies have shown up there to watch it without any parents and have camera phones with them to document the event. I wish real babies were this self-sufficient, then maybe I wouldn't be so terrified about the prospects of having some.
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| Baby #3 had this contest all along. |
The third baby, predictably, scores the highest and wins the contest. It was easy to see this coming, for two reasons. First, the baby makes some really mean dump faces as he prepares to unleash the fudge dragon. Second, he's wearing #3 on the back of his diaper, which I assume is a tribute to Dale Earnhardt. Just like the late, great Earnhardt he intimidates his competition into dropping medium sized craps, and his own diaper inflates like a poop-filled Escalade airbag.
Overall, I laughed at lot at this commercial. Since I normally hate the aforementioned cute and sentimental baby ads, this one was a welcome respite. And since it was a little demented, that made it even better. No E-trade baby nonsense here, folks. Just good old-fashioned poop humor with a bangin' soundtrack that manages to raise the weird level a couple of notches.
Final Grade: A
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